Life changed in a blink of an eye when my sweetheart husband, Sean of 20 years, was killed in a tragic car accident on May 31, 2011. Young suddenly widowed with four small children. A stay-at-home mom with no clue how to live life as a widow. Manual not included! A roller coaster of emotions. A calling I didn’t ask for & one I definitely didn’t want.
With a faded resume, I gave up my chance at a career to stay home and raise kids. Entering the workforce again, after being a mom for a decade. Trading in my comfy sweat pants, and running carpool. Dusting off my suit and pumps in the back of the closet, to head into the workforce.
Having hope, faith & optimism against all odds. Learning everything happens in life for a reason. In my book, I talk about my near-death experience and visiting the other side. Beautiful breathing account of the afterlife and how everything is connected. I realized I wanted to do something I cared deeply about. With a new lens, & appreciation for life, I set out to make a difference.
99 Ways I've Coped With Depression & Anxiety Ebook
The best things in life are FREE and $19.95 - Keep It Sassy!
We all go through ups and downs. However, when you get in that funky place and feel depressed there are things you can do to pull out of it. I'm Tracy, a survivor of depression. Here are some tools I used to escape the shitty grips of depression that gave me days where I wanted to run with scissors.
I had to retrain my brain. I had a lot of negative thoughts. When I was in my funky place of depression my mind would tell me to oversleep, not eat, drink whiskey, bitch and moan, or just give up. I felt so numb. On those days I would try to upgrade my mood, quiet my mind, and be kind to myself. On the really bad days I learned it was okay to wear my PJs and chill with the cat. It was okay to ask, "Why is life so hard?" Life is hard when trying to decipher tax code, do the math, or continue drifting along while dodging those pesky telemarketing calls from unknown numbers.
I learned to seek safe support from someone who understands. When you seek support, find someone who loves you unconditionally, like your grandma.
I learned to challenge my next dark void. I would hang onto hope and practice self-love every day, even if I didn't feel like it. Often depression feeds on itself. When depressed it is hard to find the motivation and energy to feed our spirits. I learned to find what fed my spirit. I kept awareness up and noticed things that filled my spirit, charging both soul and body battery.
We all experience sad or challenging chapters in our lives. However, I found that by shifting my mind, everything else shifted. I wish I could say now that I'm offering you an all-expense-paid trip to the Bahamas or a new inflatable unicorn float bed for a day at the lake with your bestie. I can't do that, but I can teach you how to shift your mind and leave the worst of depression behind.
It's Ok if all you did was breathe today!
How to get out of that funky place
"Holy Shifts", death of my spouse, losing my home, filing bankruptcy, broken relatively, and figuratively. I was sad, depressed, scared, lost, and felt alone. Then later, I experienced my paradigm "Holy Shift" at my core. I began to let my pain, anger, and frustration go, found forgiveness, grace, and started to heal. I began an upward trajectory, a spiritual shift from the tipping point, and awakened conscious awareness—Hope, happiness, laughter, and joy. I started again, and you can too whatever road you're on. Living in the past kills your future.
If you can laugh at the crazy events in your own life, one day things will not be easy but will get a little easier. How to find your inner strength, persevere, and thrive. Laughter helps in any situation. Hopefully, I can touch people who are struggling who need a laugh. How to laugh when you feel like crying! Literally. The beauty of finding humor through a tough situation is that you don't have to be a widow, anything counts if you are going through SHIFT… Let's laugh through the tough, find the humor in the mundane everyday situations. Holy Shift Author, Entrepreneur, Speaker, Empowered Widow & Single Mom
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"In life, we loved you dearly, in death, we love you still. In our hearts, you hold a place no one will ever fill." The irony of grief is that the person you need to talk about how you feel is no longer here.
If you are widowed, have lost someone you love and are grieving. I recommend that you find the Modern Widows Club and surround yourself with other widows that have or are experiencing the same loss as you. They speak that language you'll understand. My heart is with you in grief and mourning. Know that healing will take place it is a process, don't ignore your grief or run from it or numb the pain and hurt. It's only by facing all of it head on that you begin to heal. Lots of Love and Hugs! - Tracy
"Grief is like living two lives. One where you pretend everything is alright, and the other is where your heart silently screams in pain."
Sean Peart 10/7/66 - 5/31/2011
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